Hate Me
by SweeneyintheNight
Summary: After the death of Albus Dumbledore, Minerva McGonogall has fallen sick. After Sybil Trelawney experiences the death of the Headmistress, what better to make her feel awful but to have a visit from a fellow staff member?


Disclaimer: Song belongs to Blue October. The characters belong to J.K. Rowling, otherwise everything would have turned out happily ever after in the sixth book.

Sybil stood besides the Headmistress, feeling tears stinging her eyes. McGonogall was asleep, but that was the good thing. Sybil hated it whenever the Headmistress was awake, for she would be more depressed than the previous time she was awake. McGonogall opened her eyes and smiled at her fellow staff member. "Nice to see you," she said weakly.

"Again?" Sybil asked, giving her a heart-warming smile.

"Again."

"Well, you know I'm going to be by you until you get better."

"Or worse."

"How worse?"

"Dying."

I have to block out thoughts of you so I don't lose my head  
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed  
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I'm alone  
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home

"Please, don't say that."

"Why? Because it's the truth?"

"Because it's not the truth."

"Sybil, my time has come. Since Albus died, well, I just got sick."

"You mean you became an alcoholic. This is all Severus' fault..."

"No, it's not. It may be his fault that Albus is dead, but it's not his fault that I'm in this state."

"Yes it is. It's because of Albus' death that you became an alcoholic. It's because of you being an alcoholic that got you into this state."

"Severus didn't have a choice, as I told you before. And if I remember correctly, there used to be a time when you were very fond of our former potions master." Sybil looked at the ground with an expressionless face. She smiled and looked back at the Headmistress.

"That was a long time ago," she said.

"But it's the truth," Minerva replied.

"Yes. It's the truth."

There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain An ounce of peace is all I want for you. will you never call again?  
And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?  
And will you never try to reach me? it is I that wanted space

"You know, somebody told me you haven't lived until you have a lot of regret. I do have regret, but the regret will be cured if I tell you these things."

"Go ahead, Minerva."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I ever doubted you, I'm sorry I butchered you that one night you decided to come down for dinner."

"It's all right. I was acting pretty foolish. I mean, with me being a Muggle, I guess that all of this magic just, well, scares me."

"That never stopped your great-great-grandmother."

"No. But it would possibly stop me."

"You won't stop teaching at Hogwarts, would you?"

"No. I wouldn't, but, if you die, I don't know what to do. You've watched out for me since I first got here. Horace would become the Headmaster, and though he's a wonderful man, I don't think he fully understands the dramatic events that could affect him."

"He would. After all, the famous Harry Potter killed Voldemort over a year ago. Horace will take good care of Hogwarts. May I go on?"

"Yes."

"There is a box on the table. Please give the box to me." Sybil got up and got a wooden box, handing it to Minerva. The elderly woman opened the box, revealing a beautiful diamond ring. Sybil look at Minerva, then back at the ring.

Hate me today  
Hate me tomorrow  
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you  
Hate me in ways  
Yeah ways hard to swallow  
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

"Is that yours?" Sybil asked.

"Yes it is," Minerva replied. "It's beautiful, isn't it? I guess that I kept it pretty well hidden that I was married. Only one other person in this castle knew about my marriage. Albus."

"That's not really a surprise. He used to know everything about every staff member."

"That wasn't the way he knew about it."

"You mean..."

"Albus was my husband." Sybil stared at the ground, feeling shock flowing through her body. She looked over, with the tears stinging her eyes, seeing Minerva crying.

"I am so sorry," Sybil said.

"There's nothing for you to apologize for," Minerva said. "I loved Albus. Dearly. He was my friend, my lover."

"Did you two have any children?"

"One, but she was stillborn. You don't have any children, do you, Sybil?"

"No. I always wanted a baby, but I guess that I'm too old for that now." Minerva smiled, but started to cough violently. Sybil stood beside her, wide-eyed and afraid. Blood was being spattered everywhere. The tears were finally flowing down her face.

I'm sober now for three whole months it's one accomplishment that you helped me with  
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again  
In my sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night  
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight

"Minerva?" Sybil asked in confusion.

"Blood," she replied softly. "I'm coughing up blood. Which brings me to my next confession. It's not because of the alcohol that I'm in this state."

"What is it then?"

"I went to Horace's materials. I noticed a bottle of Woodwinds Potion."

"That potion's poisonous."

"Which is why I drank it."

"No..."

"I realize that the pain will be slow, but the death itself will be quick."

"Minerva..."

"I'm sorry, Sybil. It was the only way."

You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate  
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take  
So I'll drive so fing far away that I never cross your mind  
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind

"No. No! Why Minerva? Hogwarts needs you. The teachers need you. I need you. Please, why did you have to do this?"

"It was the only way to be with Albus again. If I'm to see him again soon, I must be dead."

"Minerva, no..."

"Goodbye, Sybil. Please, take care of everything. Never forget me." With that, Minerva stopped breathing. The hot tears poured out of Sybil's eyes and onto the long forgotten Headmistress. She got up and turned to look at the corpse of her dearly beloved friend.

Hate me today  
Hate me tomorrow  
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you  
Hate me in ways  
Yeah ways hard to swallow

Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

"I'll never forget you," she whispered silently.

Sybil stood staring at the grave, reading the words that pierced her heart whenever she saw them. When she felt a reassuring hand on her shoulder, Sybil turned and smiled at Harry Potter. "Are you okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine," she replied. "It's just really hard."

"I know. I felt the exact same way when Dumbledore died."

"She told me that she married Dumbledore, that in order to be with him, she would have to die."

"Think of it this way. She's with the person she loves."

"I know. But why do I feel so helpless."

"You'll feel better soon. I promise." Harry gave his teacher a reassuring hug and headed out of the graveyard. Suddenly, a shiver went down her spine. Sybil could sense the presence of an unwanted visitor. "It's your fault, you know," she told the shadowy figure behind her.

"I know," he replied softly.

And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave  
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made  
And like a baby boy I never was a man  
Until I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand

"I regret it," Severus went on, "but you know I didn't have a choice."

"I know," Sybil replied, not turning to face the traitor. "Minerva kept on telling me that, before she committed suicide."

"I didn't know that she would kill herself because of a friend."

"Albus was more than a friend to her, Severus! He was her husband!" There was a pause. Sybil let the tears fall on the soil, listening to Severus breathing loudly.

"Merlin..." He whispered under his breath.

"You're damned right! Who knows what will happen next! Maybe Harry will realize that it was you who told Voldemort about him and try to kill you, or much worse, himself. If you remember correctly, Severus, it's your fault that the Potters are dead!" He placed his hand on her shoulder, but she turned around, glaring into his black eyes.

He had change since she last saw him. Severus was more pale, lines were drawing out his age on his face, his eyes grew darker. "Don't touch me," Sybil growled.

And then I fell down yelling "Make it go away!"  
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be  
And then she whispered "How can you do this to me?"

"How could you do this?" she asked in anger. "And to somebody who trusted you. He trusted you, Severus. And you blew that trust by killing him! Well, look at what your killing spree has done to us all!"

"Sybil..."

"Shut up! I want you dead!"

"You don't mean that."

"What if I do?" Severus looked down at the ground, then back at Sybil. She hated it when she couldn't tell what emotion he was feeling at the time. It was hard for Severus Snape, a rock, to show his true emotions.

"I know you Sybil," Severus replied. "I know that you wouldn't want anybody dead, no matter how much they have betrayed you."

"I hate you," she whispered.

"Who doesn't? You know I didn't have a choice."

"It's your fault that Hogwarts if falling apart! Probably everyone that knows you is either thinking that this is no surprise at all or that this is the biggest surprise of all! I hope you rot in burning Hell!"

"I'm sorry." Sybil stared at him hard. Was this the Severus Snape she knew that just apologized? The second most wanted man in the Wizard World...apologizing? He pulled her into a close embrace, but she didn't push away. Instead, she leaned her head on his shoulder and started to cry on it.

Hate me today  
Hate me tomorrow  
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you  
Hate me in ways  
Yeah ways hard to swallow

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm really, truly, sorry. Could you ever find it possible to forgive me?"

"I don't know," she whispered back.

"I'm not surprised. Have you ever wondered I followed to your rooms that one evening?"

"You wanted to blackmail me for how ridiculous I sounded?"

"Far from. I was actually...going to ask you to take a walk." Sybil broke the embrace and looked at him curiously. He smiled and held out his hand.

"Would you like to take one?" he asked.

"What if you're caught?" Sybil asked.

"I don't care. As long as I'm with you, my time before going to Azkaband will be just fine." Sybil stared hard at the hand before taking it, being led out of the graveyard. "Hate me," he whispered in her ear.

"I can't," she whispered back.

Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

A/N: Yeah, it was a little bit off, but I liking twisting up the characters. I'm trying to see if I need to make a sequal or not, so if anyone wants a sequal, just comment and say so!


End file.
